Saturday, June 13, 2015

I'm Bored

I'm just going to go ahead and say it.  I'm bored.  Why am I bored?  Because it's just me and Peanut in the house together all weekend.  Well me, peanut, and the way too many animals we have lol.  

Champ went to go spend the weekend with Lovie so that leaves me at the house alone.  And let me tell you; it's a very weird feeling.  It's been a very long time since I slept alone and didn't wake up to one or both of them here.  I'm not sad or upset or anything, I'm happy that they get to spend some time together.  I'm sure both of them are having a great time and are happy to spend some (I'm sure) much needed time together, but it's just weird being in the house without either one of them.

I couldn't sleep last night, though it was nice just to lay on the couch and watch a ton of bad movies, and just not do ANYTHING.  I tried to go to sleep around midnight, but I kept waking up off and on and would stay up for a bit each time.   Unfortunately, Peanut had me up at 6am.  I don't know why he is such an early bird.

I have messed around on the computer a bit.  I've been researching some other poly blogs and websites to contact to see if they will put a link to my poly surveys to help spread the word.  The more responses that I get, the more reliable my data will be.

What I really really really need to be doing is cleaning up this house.  I don't know how it can get so messy so quickly.  It's a small house, but still....  We need to figure out some kind of schedule or something so we can all stay on top of it, but that is for another day.

Well, I guess I need to get to cleaning.

Until next time,

Tuesday, June 9, 2015

Calling all Poly People!

I have pitched a book series to my book editor about a poly series that focuses on advice from poly people.  Topics include everything from dating, to jealousy, to having kids.  I would like to have it include advice from fellow polyamorous people from around the globe.  Are you interested in submitting advice or telling your beautiful love story?  Please use the links below to submit.  You're submissions will remain anonymous.  You get to chose what name you'd like to be represented as, what questions you answer, everything.  Share as much or as little about your happy poly life as you would like.  And please share with others that might want their poly voice heard. The survey is split up into topics in order to allow people to fit in a survey as they have the time.  Thank you so much.

  • To take the Poly Stats Survey click here.
  • To take the Coming Out as Poly Survey click here.
  • To take the Metamour(s) Survey click here (please note, this survey covers topics about metamours not just for metamours to answer)
  • To take the Time Management Survey click here.
  • To take the Poly with Children Survey click here.
  • To take the Rules and Boundaries Survey click here.
  • To take the Jealousy Survey click here.
  • To take the Compersion and Happy Poly Moment's Survey click here.
  • To take the Pros and Cons of Poly Configurations Survey click here.
Until next time,

Sunday, June 7, 2015

Ask a Triad Any Poly Related Questions You May Have

Fill out the form below to ask us anything you want that is related to being poly and we will answer it.  Whether you have a question about being a triad, having a kid and being poly, or just looking for poly related advice we are here to help.  Click the Contact Us link below to submit your question or comment.

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My Surprise Visit to See Lovie

So after Lovie was gone a week, I was missing her terribly.  Champ and I talked, and decided that we'd work it out so I could surprise Lovie with a visit!

I managed to get ahold of one of Lovie's coworkers who was also attending grooming school with her.  I let her know that I was planning on coming down and when.  She was awesome and helped me coordinate the surprise.

I have to say that I was so excited the week leading up to it.  I had my bags packed the night before and it was so damn hard not to call Lovie up and scream "I'm coming to see you!"  But I had decided to surprise her so that is what I planned to do.  I am an absolute horrible person when it comes to keeping surprises a surprise, just so you know.  I had trouble sleeping the night before, and don't even get me started on how long my half a day at work felt.  It took what felt like forever for me to finally leave the office and hit the road.

The trip there was quite eventful.  It poured rain, and I almost got hit in my car.  I was so relieved when I finally got there.

I met them at a restaurant.  Champ, Lovie, and I had been texting in group text for a while.  The whole way there, I had been planning in my head how I would surprise her.  Would I just walk in?  Would I ask her to come outside?  Would I just text her and say I there?  Would I grab her hotel room key out of her car and just be in her room when she got there?  I played out all of the different scenarios in my head.  It was pretty funny actually, it felt like I was going on my first date with her, even though she has been living with me and Champ for almost 17 months at that point, but honestly me and her have never had more than a few hours alone together.  So, it kind of was like a first date. And it was our first overnight alone date.

I had finally picked out the perfect way that I was going to surprise her.  I thought that I had selected Champ's name on my phone and typed "I'm here."  My phone dinged and Lovie had written "Where?"

I almost slapped myself in the forehead.  I had grabbed the group text icon.  I took a deep breath and walked in.  I responded "I'm here" to Lovie.  I think she was quite confused because she didn't respond right away.  I walked into the restaraunt, found Lovie and her coworker, and sat down.  I was so happy to see how happy Lovie was to see me there.  I had been worried she'd be disappointed some that Champ wasn't with me.

We spent the that night bonding and having amazing sex.  The next day she woke up and had to go to school.  I spend the day at her hotel poolside building this blog, and designing some poly cards.  It was a great break from the day to day that has been bringing me down.  I was so excited when she finally came back to the hotel from school.  We went to the lake with some other students in the school, and ate the most amazing pizza I've ever put in my mouth.  Later that night we went to a gay and lesbian club together with some of the students in the school.  It was a blast.  I do not dance and I was the designated driver, so I wasn't as carefree as I would have been with a few drinks in me, but it was awesome to kinda dance, ok ok, more like stand there while Lovie danced on me, and hold hands and kiss and all that other awesome stuff in public and no one bat and eye.  I have been to a gay/lesbian club before but never with a girlfriend.  It was a much different experience.

We left the club pretty early because everyone had to be back at school early the next day.  I fell asleep in Lovies arms and slept so well.  I woke up the next day, and we said our goodbyes, but they weren't as sad as the previous week's had been.

Seeing Lovie and spending a few days alone with her made me so happy.

Until next time,

Tags: poly, polyamory, happy poly family, poly love, more than two

Our First Mini Triad Vacation

Two weeks ago, Champ and I drove down with Lovie to take her to her temporary home where she will be attending Grooming School.  It was a trip full of mixed emotions.  It was mixed with joy and sadness.

It was out 1st vacation as a triad and it was a blast.  We only got to stay one night because Lovie had to check into her own hotel and we had to get back to work, but it was fun none-the-less.  We left Peanut at home with my parents because we didn't want him to see us upset if we became emotional at goodbye time.  Plus, we all knew we would want one last threesome before she would be gone for a month.  Can't do that with a kiddo in the room.

I decided to drive my car separately and have Doll and Champ ride together.  They had been having some relationship problems lately, so I thought a few hours in the car alone, might be just what they needed.

We got to our hotel and the lovely older woman greeted us.

"Welcome.  Name please."

I told her the name it was booked under.

She furrowed her brow and said, "I'm sorry ma'am, but it looks like there has been a mistake.  They booked you as a king bed, and I'm sorry but I cannot change it because we are booked solid."

At this point, I had to stifle a giggle.  I knew it might be odd checking in three adults, but I never really gave it much thought that it would be considered a mistake when we were booked.

I thanked the woman for her concern but told her that it was no mistake and that we had booked a king bed.

She gave us the most confused look and all she said was, "Oh."

She regained her composure and told us the things that I'm sure she's said thousands of times.  You know the usual: breakfast is at blah blah o'clock, your room is on the left, parking is first come first serve.

We found our room, got our luggage and had a good laugh about how confused the woman was.

We had a great time.  We spend time snuggling in bed together, which honestly was one of the highlights of the trip.  There was no one to care for, no where we had to be by a certain time, and no work to concentrate on.  We went out to dinner, and walked around downtown.  It was so much fun.  It was also nice to hold hands with Lovie in public.  We don't do that often when we are in our hometown because #1 we usually have Peanut with us and we still have him pretty much in the dark about our relationship because we don't think he is mature enough to handle all of the information about it and #2 We live in a small town that word gets around in so damn quickly.

The day we dropped Lovie off was a sad one.  We hung around as long as we could and tried to make the best of it, but honestly you could just feel the sadness in the air no matter how much we tried to avoid it.  Champ and Lovie were a Vee for almost a year before we began our triad a little over 17 months ago, so we have all known and grown to love each other so much, and it was sad to know that a part of us would be gone for even just a month.

We finally had to say our goodbyes because we had to get home to pick up Peanut and take care of the animals.  We all tried to hide the tears that threatened to spill.  I didn't want to cry in front of Lovie because she was going to be staying there alone, I at least would have Champ home with me to comfort me if needed.

Am I glad we still went and had a mini-vacation even though we had a hard goodbye?  Yep I am.  It was awesome and so much fun.

Until Next Time,

I Miss Lovie So Badly

Lovie went away to grooming school a little over two weeks ago, and damn I miss her so badly.  She will only be gone for a month, but so far it feels like eternity.  I never thought that only after 17 months of being together, I would have grown so close to her.

The house just doesn't feel the same without her around.  It's so weird.  I thought that it might bring Champ and I closer together because we'd have some one-on-one time, but honestly the things just don't seem right without her here.

I have been doing things to try to remind her that we both love her very much and miss her.  We talk via text everyday individually and as a group. I have also sent her a card almost every day since she has been gone.  Some of the cards have been store bought, some have been just hand doodled blank cards. It's just been my way of reminding her that we will be here for her when she gets back.

Peanut has handled this the best out of all of us.  He misses her, but isn't really down.  I asked him the other day why he wasn't sad that Lovie was gone.  He looked at me in a confused manner and said, "Because she's coming back.  She's got to go to school."  Leave it to a six year old to put things into perspective.  I know I shouldn't be sad that she's gone, because she is doing what she has to do, but damn it's hard not to be.

Champ is going down to spend the weekend next weekend with Lovie, and I'm so happy for them.  I wish I could go soon, but someone has to stay and care for the animals and Peanut.  I got to go see her for the weekend last weekend, so I've already gotten a trip to see her, so I know that Champ should go alone.  I'll survive.  I'll miss them both, but I'll be ok.  If you want to read about my visit with Lovie click here.

One good thing that came out of her going away to school was that we went on our first mini vacation together as a triad.  It was only for one night but it was so much fun.  You can read about our mini vacation here.

Well, I guess that is enough crying about how much I miss Lovie.  I feel better after getting it all out.

Until next time,